RE: Psychology Addict # 58 | Punishment – An Overview Through the Lens of Psychology.
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When I saw this post, I remembered a humorous statement I once made; "in a typical African home, you can be punished for an assumed offence".
Actually, where I grew up, people see "punishment" differently. There are many reasons you may be punished like:
- Staying a few days without punishment might also attract punishment. 😃
- When you're punished and you cry, you might be punished again to stop crying. Etc.
When I talk about punishment, I'm not referring to this kind of punishment quoted below
they have to wash the dishes for the entire week because s/he broke the household rules
Even without punishment, you'd still need to wash the dishes as part of your normal duties.. I'm talking about receiving strokes of cane, beating with slippers, etc.
This has made some kids to live in fear of being punished and they tend not to relate freely with their parents. Some of them are even scared of revealing some secrets to them for the fear of being punished.
In my opinion, I think people (parents also) should focus more on reinforcements, rather than punishment. If a child knows that he will be appreciated for behaving well, he'll try his best to do that.
Nice piece again Abbey. Much love from Nigeria
Sammii!!
I am not quite sure if this is appropriate but your comment actually made giggle!
Well, this part:
Can you believe that? That is punishment for the sake of punishing. How confusing that might be for a child! My 9 year-old nephew often gets punished. I strongly disagree with it. But, hey, I am not his mum and dad. Last Christmas his punishment was not getting a gift, because he disrespected his grandmother (he shouted at her). Like you observed here I think this sort of approach just alienates the child, and I think it caused them to lose trust in their parents. I believe there are other ways of teaching a child that there are consequences to wrongdoing.
Punishing by means of physical aggression. NO, just simply no! This has a huge potential to kick start a very negative pattern or misbehaviour. It is very sad that people nowadays still resort to this mode of discipline. Those parents need to be better informed! To shape their children's behaviour through reinforcement, if anything. Just like you observed.
Thank you my dear Sammi, for your invaluable, constant support! You rock :*
Lots of love from hot Portugal! <3