Hi I'm a Doctor and I'm hating my job

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I have been in my room for less than 6 hours in the past 3 days. I had call duty lined up on Tuesday and Wednesday this week.

As if that was not enough I am in a stupid unit with a very stupid senior colleague who can not stand up for himself and shifts the blame to anybody he can.

Understand

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For you to understand my anger I need to explain my responsibility.

I am responsible for unit activities such as giving chemotherapy because I am in Hemato-oncology unit but the unit is also in pediatrics so we care for children.

I am the lowest doctor (House officer) in every way so I take orders from everyone.

I usually do not have problems taking orders until the orders sound like this:

Take that gun and point it to your head.

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My anger at the department

They gave me many call duties knowing fully well that my unit is the most difficult in the department. In addition to normal activities, we still have to give chemo because no other unit quite fits the role.

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One would feel that would be enough, but cases of Diabetes Mellitus and endocrine-related disorders also come to the unit because there is no endocrine unit.

Other units end their activities by 4 pm...the time is 3 am...I am still currently giving chemo to a patient.

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My anger at the unit

The unit knows that it is busy. And by the unit I mean my seniors. They know no other unit is getting this much work and yet they keep on taking more and more.

When we (who are the lowest of doctors...house officers) can not meet up the expectations, they get angry at us as if they cannot understand why.

Yesterday, before disappointing everyone again, I had only slept for 30 minutes. I promised to watch the chemo being done and slept off.

I hadn't time to charge my phone so until the other house officer in my unit came to wake me up didn't know the time to give the next drug had passed.

My room is a mess, cause I only have time to wear clothes and leave.

I did not have water running in my room for days so I typically would just manage the little I fetched. Yesterday I had a running stomach.

You would think that would get me exempted from work but who would do my work?

My anger at my superior

He is such a bitch!! Every time he does this thing were to look good, he has to make somebody look bad.

He keeps on putting me and the other house officer in trouble to clear his head. Meanwhile, he could just say that the work is difficult and everyone would understand.

Yesterday he tried to pin not collecting blood samples from a baby that has a bleeding problem on me. I even tried to prick the baby a few times.

If the baby had not stopped bleeding it would be a big problem.

I had to defend myself by saying that the only way I saw was to go for a femoral tap and that's when the consultant started defending me.

We are also not sure what is wrong with that baby. Our differentials span across Lassa Fever...a Doctor killer!! To some rare syndrome Kassabach-Merrits syndrome.

I am just tired of being treated like garbage at work.

I even kicked a trolly on my way out with my right pinky toe.

I just gave the last medication by 4 am.

I am supposed to be at work by 8 and I should have seen all the patients.

People will say:

You chose this line of work and I should not complain...

But nobody would see this and choose it. There are supposed to be 120 house officers...there are only 40 and we are taking all the heat and high expectations.



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12 comments
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(Edited)

Burn out and understaffing seem to be the norm in recent years thanks to the pandemic.

Sorry you are going through this. There's not much consolation I can offer, but to control your anger and make sure you don't deflect anything to the patients.

Oh, and make sure your colleagues don't know you are writing here about it.

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Naah... it'll take hive getting to a million dollars before they'll even hear about it.

I'm learning to talk calmly even when I'm frustrated so...that's one good thing about the situation.

But I'll be good...I'll have to be...

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I remember crazy call hours, it’s incredibly difficult!

How many months or years do you have left of doing these wild things? Hopefully not too much longer!

Superiors like that are terrible, sorry you have to deal with it. I hope you can get some rest in! Are your colleagues dealing with the same overburden or is it just your unit right now?

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Its just my unit. We handle too many cases within the week.

I am currently feel ill...pumped in IM diclofenac and it couldn't take me through the 16 hour call period I'm currently on.

My midnight I was struggling again.

I'm planning on getting a COVID test done...I'm yet to take vaccines...I don't even know what's right anymore...I just need to rest

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Oh yea. I've seen this problem hundreds of times. Like enforcer48 mentioned, you've got to keep that anger in check. When I got out of the military, the companies I worked for were not prepared for the salty mouth of a sailor. I told people what I thought and where they could put a lot of their ideas. It wasn't a fun experience. Never make emotional actions in the sciences. It will come back to bite you.

So, if your seniors don't understand the plight of the lower doctors, or don't care, what are you to do?

Speak their language.

Here's an example. Power plants like coal, nuclear, or any other type that utilizes high temp/pressure steam to generate electricity must enact strict chemistry controls to mitigate corrosion. These plants are meant to run for decades. The industry is so serious about regulating the corrosion reaction that they will measure corrosion particles down to the parts per trillion constantly.

Anyway, the Institute for Nuclear Power operations say that the levels of feed water iron (the water being pumped into the Steam Generators (SGs)) was rising throughout the industry. They implemented a much lower limit on iron going into the generators to prevent those pesky reactivity accidents (think Three Mile Island as an example - not corrosion related though).

The seniors understand money. And impact to performance indicators. They do not understand the plight of the worker because their job does NOT require that level of attention. The company I worked for at the time decided to tie management bonuses to the new chemistry limit. If you meet the limit, you're good to go for that sweet sweet bonus. Lol. I'll never forget the day when I looked at the most recent sample reports to find the power station was above the limit. It was Christmas day.

The changes made in the power plan to achieve the lower chemistry limit improved the lives of definitely the chemistry department. It was all because corporate tied money to performance.

I don't know if this will work for you, but if you tie your conditions to some cost or company vision metric, you may find a faster response to your problem than you've seen.

Best of luck.

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I get you...but its a government job...meaning they can't really pay you extra for extra work unless its from the goodness of their hearts. But there don't have goodness in their hearts.

I'm very sick now and I'm working on getting a sick leave anyway cause they'll soon kill me out here...

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Government jobs are the hungriest for cost-cutting measures. I hope you get that sick leave, though. You definitely sound like you need a break.

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Other sick doctors were sent back to work so there was no use askingfor the sick leave. I also heard they'll make you redo the hours spent on your sick leave...so I have decided to try.

I spent yesterday sleeping and today I felt very good.

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Nice. The longest I've ever slept after duty at a prior job was 22 hours. You deserve the rest. The whole world changes once you do. I wish the higher ups would realize this fact.

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Oh my gosh, I am so sorry @ebingo, that you have to go through this..
I can and will never understand why people have to throw others under the bus to look good.You can just hype yourself and leave others out of it.

This is crazy!

I am really hoping things get better for you in your career.
That You are a Doctor doesn't mean you cannot have a life too.

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Thanks for the nice words.

Its just that the current system we have going on in the hospital has made it so hard for even my seniors to be responsible.

I will never under stand my registrars behaviour anyway but I'll take it that one day all his doings will catch uo to him.

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