Breaking news ! Fake moon landing ?...New footage shocks the world !

in #funny5 months ago

NASA has come forwards today after the recent emergence of some 'never seen before footage' , to release a statement.

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Unfortunately, NASA have had to rescheduled the press conference after losing the 'a piece of paper' technology , and were now in the process of trying fix the problem. They will try to reverse engineer the issue so as to be able to give the full press release at a later date.

When asked how long it would take to do this, NASA said,
"Look, we're not very good at all this reverse engineering stuff.
It's very complicated getting your 20 terrabyte of RAM computer, to work like a Texas instruments calculator from 60 years ago...
All the new technology that makes it a walk in the park for everyone else to do these things, is unavailable to us on our 7 billion dollar, annual budget."

He added , " We're even thinking of upgrading to Mircosoft Vista next year, and you have to pay even more the 'professional edition', so that's pretty much blows all possible space travel outta the window for the foreseeable future.... "

This new material that's been flooding the internet has raised even more speculation, that we've never been beyond the outer atmosphere at all .

It has now been proposed that the furthest that we've ever actually traveled to, was to an isolated mountain - In Wales.

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While NASA admitted that the rock formations in this photograph do have an uncanny likeness to some sheep called Gertrude and Gemima, from Aberystwyth - it's all entirely down to the effects of wind erosion on the rock leading to the creation of some bizarre shapes.

They said that they'd have to circle back in regards to the question of there being no wind on the moon to cause such erosion, stating that :
"That can only be answered by our 'that's a tricky one' dept. , and they're out for lunch at the moment, and have been for the last 50 years in fact - but I'm sure they'll be able to give us a complete answer upon their return."

When questioned about the astronauts seemingly not wearing their helmets - in an environment with no atmosphere - it was pointed out that it would be 'very rude' to have a photo taken without showing your face.
The spokesman also added that " They're highly trained astronauts and they can hold there breath for up to 14 hours under such circumstances."
He also added " I mean, who'd want a piccy all the way from the moon without showing your face? That's just ludicrous."

When asked about the new video footage that's been released, the NASA spokesman told the press meeting that this was due to an undisclosed technology at the time, and that the landing craft used for the first mission was from a Swedish company called IKEA, who specialized in flat pack assemblies.

He explained that they wouldn't want to spoil any photo's with something that looked like a toy that's been built by a 6 year old made from tinfoil and toilet roll tubes, and as such, they made the landing craft in such way as to be fully collapsible as, and when, required.

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He also explained that the astronauts looked very small due to atmospheric pressure on the Moon, even though it has no atmosphere.

At this point in the conference, the NASA spokesman became very defensive.

When asked about the figure in the background in the video clip, who was apparently, wearing no space suit, he snapped at the reporters, saying "Have you ever tried chasing a sheep with all that fucking equipment on?.... No, I didn't think so."
He then promptly left the conference ( with a pronounced limp in his right leg).

NASA are expected to return to the press conference sometime within the next 60 years - But only if they don't lose their 'leg walking' technology first....

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